Today’s Drifting Thoughts: The Prelude - The Angel With Bounded Wings

There’s two parts in me, that I can and will never deny.

One part of me, is the outer image that most project on me: following a persona which is molded based on opinions of others as well as my own perception of the social expectation. Or simply put, the “yes-man” in me - the one part of me in which I have expressed some dissatisfaction over in the past… and the key driver to my own thoughts.

One part of me, is the uncivilized self: which contains some of violent impulses which I have been suppressing in some way or the other… the strong urge of disgust, hatred, violence and sex. Which is also the part of myself which I am in fear to face… which is the key concern that I have been reiterating from time to time in my own LJ.

From time to time, there’s always a strong urge of inquiry within me: Is these two parts really was who I am? Is my life is nothing but misery written all over? And these life questions have been spinning on my head ever since the first time I contemplated and doubted my own existence in the past - and all it does is just going like a merry-go-round without really going anywhere…