Let’s see…

Surprisingly, the haze is getting worse around here :(. That really makes me feel sad because I miss fresh air.

Surprisingly, I find myself expanding my musical horizons as I started to listen to pop in English. XDDD I used to think that American music is a bit… uninspiring, but now I’m starting to love it :). Guess it’s really refreshing to take a break away from tons of Eurobeat and JPop :).

Surprisingly, I found myself having my budget boomed at the beginning of the month O_O”

Surprisingly, I got my book prize cheque :D! (Joys of being academically successful :p) That really saved the day.

In other news, I just collected my degree certificate and my stage photo. And surprisingly they looked quite nice 😊 (well… definitely not my best photo shots).

Ganked from pawsrpg:

I could be the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I could be the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I could be the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We could be the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I could be the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I could be the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I could be one of the lucky ones …

Reaching here, only I notice that there’s always a beginning and never an end. Like a constant flow, everything moves on at its own pace, never once leaving a trace, yet never once leaves without leaving an influence.

This, is the infinite energies of living.

I don’t know whether I should say that there’s a lot of things happened then… ironic as it sounds that nothing much really happened when I looked back at the events itself. But nonetheless it does gave me some emotional impact (refer to my previous post for my condensed thoughts of it).

Anyway, just get the tapes of memories rewinded and summarised…

Friday has been a very exciting day for me as I anticipated the arrival of my family (except for my sister). However, what I didn’t anticipate is that something may go wrong in the process… and it did happened as things goes slightly wrong with my brother. As I heard from him, he is caught in the middle of nowhere when the bus which my brother is suppose to board …

Everything starts like a beginning of a carnival, with all the glamour and splendor that sparks in the events of excitement.

Yet like the grand fireworks blasted to mark the end of it, all the light speckle seems to dim away in the vast darkness.

As everything fades away, I kept on wondering… am I living in a dream, or am I dreaming a beautiful live?

… I’m now staring a blank sky, feeling my hands slightly trembling as I feel the light fades in my heart…

I’m trying out posting a LJ entry using my mobile phone. 😊

Anyway, parents came today, convocation tomorrow, some worrying drama just now. Things probably will get exciting.

Will post details this sunday.

[p/s: w00t! It works :D. Probably it’ll be good for some impromptu posts next time!]

It does seems that there’s a lot of things that has rushed past me without notice…And sometimes I do wonder whether knowing what has passed by will make any difference… Honestly speaking I really don’t know what makes me think this way? Is it that I’m missing something in life? Or is it that I came to a realization that knowing what has passed has no importance in my present life than bringing me regrets?

Getting in tune with my own pace in life is definitely not easy for myself.

Anyway, coming back to yesterday, I took a half day leave to collect my convocation attire. Yup, I’ll be attending my graduation ceremony this Saturday. The event itself didn’t really excite me much, but it does make me feel …

Sometimes I just need a reminder that if I’m taking an emotional break, that is equivalent to enjoying some peace and quiet that has been given to me.

Just that… There are some feelings that I still keep to myself, restraining it… The very same feeling that I had the in the past but to a much lesser degree (Probably it’s a “Deja vu” to some) It’s not that it’s bothering or depresses me or anything, just that I still feel a bit uneasy… It’s like, I still hold the strong belief of making sure one’s feelings and accessing the situation before committing myself to it, just that from time to time I feel as if I have been challenged again and again… Sometimes I feel as if I …

From time-to-time,
I couldn’t stop looking back
from where I have been

With awe,
I see the path
on which I have travelled

Looking forward,
I see the path ahead
With awe,
I see vastness

And then,
With hesitation,
My body goes a-trembling…

…

That pretty much how I feel now… I can’t really finish or polish it just yet as I really have no idea what is going to be ahead on me. (and it’s been a while since I last write poems and stuff, meh…)

Guess I might as well resume with my own plans and work.

Originally posted as a comment in my friend’s blog, but I just think that I want to keep a copy here:

A lot of times, it really depends on how you look at things: What are you thinking when you are climbing a mountain? Is it to conquer the mountain? Is it to prove the strength of oneself? Or is it just to explore and enjoy the journey?

Life is always a continuous journey of different destinations at different times. And what guides you through is your own decisions that you make in due course of time.

Just enjoy the journey! Enjoy the present moment and don’t look back with regrets. Then it’s possible to feel youthful again even after the journey back from the mountain tops :).

Sometimes whether I write these …