Currently doing some last minute packing, and I’m feeling sleepy X_X… not to mention that I need to catch the cab at 10:30 in the morning (meaning: 6 hours later): Thanks to myself hanging around too long at Wikipedia reading stuff that brought me down the memory lane (notably: Ultraman).

By most circumstances I won’t be updating my LJ for this week, as I will be up at Genting Highlands to work for a whole week. Basically I’m up there to assist the installation of a new system and standby to troubleshoot any problems that arose. Hopefully the whole thing will go smoothly. But somehow I do feel a bit anxious as I’m definitely not prepared… >_<

Well… Just work my best then!

Upon attaining something, you’ll lose something in return. From that hypothesis, upon attaining the ultimate, or that all wishes has been fulfilled, a “death” is certain.

Currently I’m still following my own train of thoughts… finding the roots of all issues and dealing with them. And somehow it’s like… it’s starting to get more harder and harder to face. Let’s use this recent happening as an analogy to this: It’s been a long, long time I have been suffering with sinus problems. It’s like… hardly I can remember the days when I don’t need tissue paper or when I’m not sneezing. So I have pretty much attribute that to my poor health… or the impression of it.

But after I changed my towel blanket to a summer quilt, the sneezes has stopped completely. And from that it’s not hard for me to realized that all this while I have been allergic to …

“别人一定比我更好”，一向以来都存有这样一个观念。或许就是因为这个观念，好多时候觉得自己所做的一切都是徒劳…然后渐渐演变成逃避，畏缩。

生活开始失去了色彩，做事开始失去了自信，开始不敢去冒险改变：这样的我…虽然十分厌烦，但却无意识下接受。接受一个充满垃圾的世界…这真的是自己真的想要的吗？

这，或许是自己曾经不愿意承认的事实吧！

“Others must be better than me”, all this while I have been having such a perception. Maybe it’s because of this perception, a lot of times I felt that all the effort I put into anything was just pointless… And therefore it started to became avoidance, timidity.

Life starting to lose its colours, I start to lose my own confidence, becoming less and less brave to take risks and change: This particular “self”… Although I despise it, but unconsciously I accepted that myself. Accepting a world full of crap… is this really something that I wanted?

This fact, is probably what I used not to like to admit it at all.

Finally~ I got my hands on Domino’s self title album and Maharaja Night Hi-NRG Revolution Vol.9! I have been wanting these two albums for years I’m really excited to finally bought them ^-^v.

Just listened to Domino’s album and Domino always has the ability to cheer people up with her upbeat tunes :D. This album is really a godsend after a hard day’s work! 😸

And… well… to be honest, my interest in collecting Eurobeat has always been supported by my insistence in getting MNHR9, it’s like “well… let me just get something else until MNHR9 comes along!”. With this, I have gained much exposure to different kinds of music. And now… I had achieve that small goal I had, I don’t know, it’s pretty much a …

Thinking about it, from many perspective I was still being mentored, either directly or indirectly. Sometimes I do get a bit frustrated with the pace I’m progressing. Probably the same feeling as being a disciple of a master who is still training on the basics every single day.

Currently I’m fine tuning my computer a bit, as well as converting my CD collection back to MP3 again X_X. Well… it really can’t be helped since a new MP3 player is in the cards (although I think I’m setting back the plan to buy a new one much later… probably middle of next year? But more likely it’d be by the time when my favourite musics start to accumulate to 20GB).

As well, I’m still realigning (at least attempt to) my plans, as in things that I wanted to do. There’s seems like mountains of stuff that I wanted to do X_X|||. I think my persistence has been tested for a lot of times in the past with mixed results, but… well, it’s just another go to …

It’s been quite some time that I felt very out of place,… at least that’s what I felt deep down. Not really sure whether is it the changes causes the turmoil, or that I’m being more sensitive and attuned to myself, or that I’m just imagining things.

Especially when it comes to my own health and body… it just felt… strange, in many way. There were times when I felt that the body wasn’t mine, or that I felt some weird and not-so-positive sensations at some part of the body (e.g. at one time I felt some sort of weight in my stomach).

At this point it’s like I’m still experimenting and adjusting my own lifestyle and thoughts. There’s still a lot of loose ends and …

around the world / move

[lyrics by motsu (move)]

※Trip to the world
Yo! here we go unknown world へと
生まれたばっかりの旅人
慣れない足どりもまた愛嬌 キメるとこだけバシッと!
So many people in this world
時に中傷とかもないわけじゃないけど
ツマンナイとこはWarpしてこう 筋だけは通し生きてる
That’s our low!

あてのないTrip
One way ticket to your soul, let’s go!
ブッ飛び続け見つけるYour goal
愛しあい時代に感じあい
さまざまなドラマつくってこう
So many thing we wanna try
Pop songの底に隠れてるDeep style
５０億の願い 渦巻くWorld きっと誰かに届くYour light

息さえつかない 眠れない街
隙も見せずに笑いあって
嘘さえSafety ホントがEmpty
危ないぐらいにwanna shut and break out!

(Now we gotta start Let’s get move)

☆Let’s move into the brand new world
Let’s dive into the brand new trip
広い世界におびえてる
始まったばかりのNow we go full speed and funky beat
きっと輝く around the world

誰かに届くまで 力強くBrand new wind
未来を描く 地図もない
愛だって恋だって マジに出会いたいよ
It’s the time to Travelin’ around the world

Information 秒速で伝わる時代
でもChoiceの仕方がわからない
Money can’t buy my love …

Probably the real message behind “I don’t understand you” is “you didn’t do something that I hoped/wished/expected”.