其实就是那样，那说不出来的自私。

The reality is that, that inexpressible selfishness.

My mood now is best described as a cloudy day. Mostly being disappointed by myself and all anxious about the things that happened to me these days. Just one of those days when I felt life is harsh and crazy

But anyway, despite that (or should I say instead of whining over it in my LJ?), let me just share some of my PPP arcade videos taken on Saturday when I was at Genting Highlands (after working hours, of course :p). (Speaking of which, it’s been a while I haven’t filmed any para videos):

JEAAAAAlooooouSEEEEE~~~~ 😛

Here’s something you didn’t get to see everyday: A PPP machine tilted XDDD.

At least these brighten up my day a little… 😊 Definitely needs to film some para someday.

[p/s: Yes, these are indeed button …

For four years of online shopping, this is the first time that I was informed of a credit card fraud O_O||.

I’m lucky in the sense that the customer service of the bank called up as soon as they notice any online transactions being made on my cards. And just now when I received the call I was like… stunned O_O|||. Considering the fact that the card in question is the one that I’m currently using for most of my online shopping and I didn’t key these sensitive data in these days (meaning: I only shopped at eBay and used PayPal in recent shopping spree a few months ago), I wonder how and where the culprits got it…?

Funny thing is that I was just considering whether I should cancel my debit …

Let’s see… I’m starting to be busy these days, mostly because of fault reports starting to pile up. It was stressful at times as problems is outpacing my progress in solving them. I’m still learning how to cope with it, well, you know, with all these stress and emotional distress, keeping tabs with my own focus and calm is something very challenging indeed.

It does seems to me that it was like a warfare in smaller scale. At the moment I was kept on to my toes and having the need to keep my alertness level high… can’t be laid back as I would want to be.

And then I was up there at Genting for the past two days as we held our annual Programming Competition. Although it’s still …

Once I reached… only death is certain.

What is it really? The feeling of love! In which its meaning was unto its own, which can’t be expressed using any medium.

Whenever a thought or judgement is formed and chosen, indirectly its contradiction will be accepted as well, which there’s no willingness to accept it.

Therefore, the beginning of a conflict.

What would you call as the greenest pasture? What would you call as a paradise?

At this blinding pace of life, I don’t whether I wanted to call that barrier as a hindrance or an opportunity to growth. Or probably I’m just seeing challenges as a massive roadblock in which it’s hard enough to go around it or go over it? Not sure whether I’m magnifying every single problem that I faced in life ^^||.

At the same time, I’m in an information overloading situation that I find myself extremely weighed down. Part of the reason is probably caused by my own insistence in grasping/learning too much subjects at once. Somehow reflecting on that, I was indeed doing a lot of micromanagement in my own life… laying out my own expectations on how I would like things to be.

And as time has passed, although …

Such discontentment! As if the progress up until now seemed so minute! To what I’m comparing myself?

- Understanding self expectations -