In a way, even one’s fantasy is limited to one’s experiences.

It’s been a quiet birthday today, probably been a while I didn’t spend quiet time alone: reading books, enjoying good food, watching anime… Just simple pleasures with myself, so it is.

24 years I have been here, I wonder how much that I have been through? Somehow that’s something that I didn’t understand completely… or at least I can’t pinpoint the scope of my own question :). In some way or the other, the birthday wish for this year is still almost the same as last year in terms of pattern. It’s just a small wish, really, but sometimes the simplest things may be the hardest thing to get in life, isn’t it?

There’s more for me to learn, really. At this point (I believe I have repeated …

There’s no such thing as someone deserves someone, as there are some things that are not serve-able.

Tomorrow’s my birthday! And I get to get my own presents today (with my own money, of course ^^||).

By sheer chance I finally found Misia’s Marvelous CD <3! But the bad news is that it had scratches that it’s can’t play beyond Everything ;____;. Also meaning that I have to go back to the shop and ask for a replacement (less likely, seeing how scarce Japanese CDs were in Malaysia). Probably will see what I’d replace it for then. But seeing the tracklist, I think I’d do a special order for this one :).

I also got some new Japanese books. To be honest my attempts to learn the language are almost on-and-off attempts that didn’t last longer than a month ^^||. And I kept buying books to learn my …

Whatever one’s expressions, each expression will have millions of interpretations.

- The Order of Chaos -

或许心中存在着那个空洞，所以才会期盼…才会去寻找填补的方法。

\－成长之章－

Maybe it’s because there exists a void in our own hearts, that’s why we wished… that’s why we continuously finding the way to fill it up.

- The Chapter of Growth -

For those who are wondering why my disappearance a few days back… due to my carelessness of drinking the cup of water which I have left on my office desk before I went up to Genting Highlands (read: three days), I ended up having food poisoning and fell sick until yesterday.

Moral of the story: Don’t leave food or drinks on your office table after you left… no matter what and at whatever cost!

Now I’m still recovering… My health and appetite has yet to recover back to normal, and I do feel a bit dizzy at times when I walk around (especially right after I get out from bed). I wonder whether it has to do with blood circulation? At the moment I really felt that I didn’t had enough blood …

So here I am again, at Genting Highlands on standby for the launch of our new game.

Winding back to Thursday, it had been a disaster when we tried to recover the database. Disaster in the sense that the data anomalies were beyond repair and the system is to be launch the next day. So… to cut the long story short, Sze Hau, Kok Weng and I have broke the record of the longest time staying in the office, clocked at 2 in the morning ^^||. And I am expected to wake up at 7.30 in the morning to go up to the hill to standby during the launch.

Looking at the bright side of things, well… at least things were going smooth at the moment and things weren’t as hectic as I would …

Been in a very angst-ridden and frustrated mood today, well… it was a roller coaster ride indeed these days ^^||.

… Probably still caused by the fact that I don’t like losing things that I (at least, perceived) that I hold dear to. Or at least when things get out from my own hands, I think. At times like this, some of the most negative aspect does shown in some way or the other: possessiveness, emotional, self-pity, jealousy… all lot of different emotions came to me. As much as I didn’t show it (or at least kept it to myself), it’s not really a good idea to vent it on my own surroundings (although I think it had leaked a bit in some way)… after all, it’s still a problem of my own …

自己最想要的东西，未必会得到，也可能一世也碰不到。就因如此，就更应该全力以赴，充满地活着。

The thing that we wanted the most, not necessarily will be attained, and even more possible that we will never touch it in our whole life. Just because of that, we need to do our best and with fullness, live our lives to the fullest.