After the recent events occurring, I already made up my mind that I’ll give it another chance. (So… Erika, that will be my own reply 😊 )

However… I can’t believe that two chances have been blown in a mere two days.

For those who don’t understand why I say “chances”, it has something to do with my own Three Chances Principle. Basically for any occasion, I’m extremely lenient with mistakes, especially those involve others or made by others. However, I always set my bar at 3 chances, and once these chances are used up, it’ll make me take serious action regarding that issue.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that more chances can’t be given to a person to make up a past mistake, but has to be earned.

So …

Sweet memories will still be there… as much I tried not to look back…

The very smile… which gave me the strength… will always live on. As much as I always doubt my own decisions… his words… telling me to move on… to look forward… in the eyes of what’s ahead of me.

It’s time for me to move forward… and appreciate what I have and to strive for what I have wanted to achieve.

…It’s hard for me to cry…

…For you have gave me enough strength to feel strong…

… In continuity of my midnight post, basically everything is OK now since we came to a conclusion (at least the conclusion that inferred) is that there’s just a lot of misunderstanding between us.

But considering how much damage I have done… now I was asked to think really carefully… about whether to continue it… or stop it completely…

As much I know what my first impulse decision is, I was asked to think carefully… really carefully. Because it is an important decision for both of us.

Honestly… this is the hardest decision I have to make thus far.

It’s been quite some time I have been putting much thought into it… ever since the beginning. … A lot of things, actually…

There’s just a lot of thoughts, floating in my brain… trying to …

(F) sayin mango: it’s funny ha…
(F) sayin mango: maybe it’s a thing for all the guys…
(F) sayin mango: to play with women’s heart like tat… … (F) sayin mango: u expect me to forget all this….and be really close frens with u as usual…
(F) sayin mango: i will never forget tat u said u loved me and wanna be with me…

For these words hurts me the most… I just can’t stand but feeling… so deeply painful that I really can’t bear it… that really made me feel like a jerk.

Felix Leong — To Understand and To Feel: i never seek forgiveness… for the things i failed you, i deserved to be dead
Felix Leong — To Understand and To Feel: i never seek you to forget… for …

I’m going to speak in codes today, so here’s the one-liner:

I luv my blankie ^^.

For those who like to break codes, well… just make your best guess :p.

Ever since yesterday I have been having a really indecent dream about someone yesterday and I can’t seem to get it off from my head, somewhat making my hormones tingle off and on. Argh~ Stupid mind working like a broken VCR XDDDD.

[To a certain someone who is definitely going to be curious: No, it’s not Choon Hui. 😛

:edit: being even naughtier And noooo~ It’s not you either XDDDD]

Today’s a big yeah for our fellow Muslim friends: They finally endure their fasting month! (at least those over here :p) So yeah, the end of Ramadan. And it also a day to seek forgiveness and to remember that family ties are always important (OK, that’s pretty much all that I know about the Muslim culture ^^”)

Anyway, I’m back at home now :). Well… as much I have to do some school work and stuff, everything’s pretty relaxed at home. That’s home sweet home for you 😊.

Gotta go! Ja ‘ne! 😊

Hot damn this song seems to grow in me so dramatically that it always makes me wanna cry. 😊 It’s just a beautiful song, I somewhat recalled that I have listened to the original on the radio when I was a kid, and never knowing that it’ll make me like it so much. 😊 Think I really need to dig the song out from somewhere, at least the original :). [It’s in my Ultra Parapara Dance Nonstop Megamix CD, by the way]

Anyway~ The lyrics~

Total Eclipse of The Heart (Eurobeat Version) / Nikki French

(Original by Bonnie Tyler)

Turn around…
Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and
you’re never coming round.
Turn around…
Every now and then I get a little bit tired of
listning to the sound of my …

Copied from my techical journal, The Digital Blue Wave:

Coming back to my techie life, I have been pretty much slowly crawling back to the things that I used to do: exploring new technological advances, doing more programming, keeping focus on what I want to achieve, mastering some skills, and so on. And of course, what’s a techie life all about if we didn’t get into the community :)? So yeah, so I made my silent return to a few tech forums that I used to join in the past.

There’s one particular forum that I kind of find it funny. It’s not because it has some new wacky changes that made it humorous, but instead it’s because it seems that the community haven’t changed a bit.

So the story …

I now declare myself inethical for stealing company (that I’m working for)’s bandwidth to download songs from @music which I’ll pay later back at home.

Hmm…. XDDDD

Anyway, I’m back at work, still pulling hair out to program encryption stuff for the company. 😣 Bleh… With all the education/Cryptography classes I have taken (at least last semester), the theory does needs some digesting before I can cough out some practical codes X(.

Anyway, 8 hours more… I hope that I can win that Maharaja HI-NRG Night Vol. 11 from eBay (Gorky Park and Babe Follow Me <3333). crosses fingers