Make it a short one:

Ever since the past few weeks… I just feel some sort of anxiety and apprehension, which gets stronger and stronger by the day.

Some change is occuring… and I know it’s there and yet I really don’t know what is going to change.

An apprehension to something unknown… heh, as much on the surface it’s seems funny and unfounded, but deep down… I know it’s not.

Should I embrace it? Or should I wait and see? But the feeling… is so strong that it’s hard for me not to pay attention on it.

…

Closing my eyes… I see myself… in a stream of constant change… Thoughts fleeting past me, people walking past me… every single second retiring…

Is changing oneself hard? Or is it that …

Originally posted as a comment in Ahmed journal, but it kinda clicked with me so I posted up here as well ^^.

And yeah, now that you mentioned it, I seem to notice that I use “often more than not” a lot. XDDD (or, the one I’m more comfortable with: “more often than not”) But I see that as a change in myself, because looking back, my catch phrase is “maybe”. 😛 Guess I’m growing up somewhat :).

Coming back that “often more than not”, the reason why I like to use it is perhaps it’s part of my nature that I don’t see things in black and white, I always leave that shade of gray there (as much people would say that I’m indecisive or not holding strong with my own principles …

I NEED this but…

;____;

I really want a GBA… now! (Together with FFTA would be a bonus though…)

Or maybe I should wait for Nintendo Gameboy DS instead for that juicy FFIII port as well… GAH~~~!!!!

[:: Edit: Linky fixed ::]

So… I got some new CDs: hitomi’s thermo plastic & Final Fantasy X-2’s OST :). I break one rule though: Because my principle is that I don’t listen to any game music that I have never played before. But… since it’s hard for me to find game music CDs anyway (stupid Digicube for not exporting game music ;___;, and I SWEAR that I’m not going to buy another bootleg anymore), and so I bought it :3.

Anyway, I haven’t listened to them both yet XDDD. Well… at least not the whole CD :p. Hitomi’s style seems to remind me of the main vocalist in globe (forget the name), but first impression wise… well… I still need some time listening this CD a few more times. But… I really love Koda …

For those who didn’t notice, my user info basically reflects a lot on myself… and the direction of my own life. My LJ is pretty much a record of my own journeys, which pretty much reflects on my own life from many aspects. And every single post has been done with a lot of heart and soul poured into every single word choice.

I believe it’s time to change it… To signify another milestone.

For those who didn’t get to read the first version (I’m taking it down), here it is, accompanying version 2 at the bottom.

Chapter 1: Jan‘04

A computer science student bored out of his mind
Ends up deciding to trying to inject words into describing his already boring personal life:

Perhaps I’m just waiting for …

For some reasons… I just felt that something is going to happen yesterday… And so it did.

Yesterday has been an important day for me… well… honestly technically it shouldn’t be yesterday, but days before. But that doesn’t really matter anyway.

… All I can say, Erika have changed a lot during the past week. And it’s not the normal “a lot”, but a drastic “a lot”. It’s like… a total difference from her persona in school, I would say it’s the stronger side of her: confident, assertive, clear minded and… well, strong. And the coolest thing is that, she acquired a British accent! OMG! That’s freaking cool, I wished I had that! 😄 Well… but then again that would translate to the fact that most of my close friends would …

Cut so that poor dialup users don’t have to suffer that over 100k image download ^^”.

Anyway, I’m not sure whether this cover design is going to get through (well… if they say no I have to design another one ^^”), but it took me quite some time to come up with this and I’m extremely proud of it ^^.

Currently at work… kinda tired actually due to lack of sleep, yet I still have to work dies. See you guys later then!

Well… today’s a pretty normal day. The only shocking part is that… My numerical analysis mid-terms is on next Saturday while my finals is on 6 December O_O”. And I haven’t even touch ANYTHING yet >.<”. Not to mention my final year project stuff, work and the design for the orientation booklet. (seeing myself having a hard time juggling responsibilities ._.”).

Anyway, other than that, yay for me donating blood for the eighth time :3. The first-aid society is getting better and better as we see more sponsorship coming in (seeing that our souvenirs and our gift pack is getting bigger and bigger). The only quirk is that it’s the first time I ever donated 450cc of blood (my usual is 300cc… you know, being underweight and stuff :p), thanks to wrong weighing …

Finally I got that stupid programming bug out. Phew… that’s a really tough one to weed x_x”.

Anyway… currently I’m not feeling entirely well today, my head somewhat hurts a bit. A sign of minor illnesses, hoo hoo hoo… Guess that means that I need to keep tabs with my own well being.

More work awaits me to do… and honestly I feel overwhelmed x_x”. Bleh… doing it one at a time, tra la la~ 😛

Let me just do more artwork now.

Listening to Easy / Lolita now bought from @Music <3333.

Thanks to shawaazu for the help <333!