Drifting Thoughts of the Past: Support Pillars

This is an extract (or only partial) of my theories regarding view emotional support as pillars, which is basically in the form of an MSN conversation with Allen.

(01:57:03) Allen: and this morning after i read that message, i ws even thinking of running to my ex to seek comfort (01:57:07) Allen: eeks (01:57:09) Allen: lol! (01:57:18) Felix Leong: i’d say it’s normal (01:57:26) Allen: all the social connection are online (01:57:31) Felix Leong: after all, at one point your ex was a very strong emotional support (01:57:50) Felix Leong: compared to the likes of myself being a normal friend who shared heart to heart talks (01:58:18) Felix Leong: that’s how emotional support pillars work (01:58:45) Allen: now i finally know what emotional support pilars means 😛 (01:59:33) Felix Leong: heh, that’s one of my fav theories/analogy that i like to use (01:59:46) Felix Leong: at least for drifting thoughts 2007 (02:00:05) Allen: haha i wasn’t that clear of ur term (02:00:31) Allen: now i finally know it’s a kinda emotional safety net (02:00:32) Felix Leong: well, basically it’s a long theory on its own (02:00:39) Felix Leong: yeah (02:00:57) Felix Leong: but safety nets are more meant for emergencies, imho (02:01:07) Allen: the thing the ease our pain and sooth the heartache (02:01:15) Allen: oh? (02:01:25) Allen: there’s another term for emergency? (02:01:36) Felix Leong: pillars are more vital if you look your being as a structure (02:02:32) Allen: visualising (02:02:32) Felix Leong: i would say safety nets have to be your parents, or whomever you are most grounded with (02:02:42) Allen: ahh i see (02:03:07) Allen: well i dun have gay emotional support anyone from family yet (02:03:31) Felix Leong: that’s why safety nets were as good as to keeping you afloat (02:03:40) Felix Leong: but never good enough to support you through (02:03:54) Felix Leong: well… at least from my current situation (02:04:15) Felix Leong: that’s how it looked (02:04:15) Allen: true…i guess same as me unless my parents are open minded (02:05:20) Felix Leong: i prefer using the term pillars because that’s the part that supports your roof (02:05:30) Allen: oic (02:05:38) Allen: so see ourself as a roof (02:05:52) Felix Leong: at least a person beneath the roof (02:06:17) Felix Leong: the roof can be just sufficient enough to give you shelter or well built enough to give you comfort (02:06:32) Felix Leong: that represented our physical surroundings (02:06:41) Allen: i see (02:06:56) Felix Leong: the pillar, is whatever that supports it (02:07:10) Felix Leong: typically if there’s no pillars, the roof have to be balanced on your head (02:07:40) Allen: yeah or fall on top of us (02:07:43) Felix Leong: therefore things like fear, insecurity, emotional instability comes from (02:08:06) Allen: i see (02:08:30) Felix Leong: therefore pillars were important (02:09:02) Allen: pillars is just for our lovers? or they are included our parents? (02:09:06) Allen: n support peers? (02:09:09) Felix Leong: they can be anything (02:09:34) Felix Leong: but will definitely vary in strength (02:10:14) Felix Leong: but if you have a lot of pillars, you are already in a state of comfort that you’ll prefer to sit under one pillar (02:10:23) Felix Leong: hugging it occasionally (02:10:31) Felix Leong: almost as effective as a teddy bear (02:10:41) Felix Leong: usually that pillar would be your lover (02:10:49) Allen: ahhh (02:10:51) Allen: i see (02:11:02) Felix Leong: but it can be something else depending on which stage of life you are in and what’s the most important (02:12:05) Felix Leong: the perception of distance between our heads and the roof, as well as the very thought that the roof may fall on our heads, represents our mind (02:12:13) Felix Leong: illusions, fears, desire… (02:12:25) Allen: i see (02:13:00) Felix Leong: but essentially, if you are able to look from a different angle, you are also a pillar on your own (02:13:13) Felix Leong: which may as well support several roof at once (02:13:27) Allen: isee (02:13:40) Felix Leong: and, at least by this analogy and my current theory, is that once you see the interdependency and able to see past your own perception (02:14:01) Felix Leong: you will be enlightened and hence you have become “fearless” (02:14:24) Felix Leong: and therefore capable to go beyond the roof to the infinite (02:14:49) Allen: the self pillar angle is still unclear for me hehe or umm 陌生 (02:15:08) Felix Leong: i.e. the roof may as well be an invisible barrier (02:15:23) Felix Leong: it’s ok if you don’t understand the self pillar part (02:15:33) Felix Leong: as i have always said, it’s just my theory (02:15:54) Felix Leong: nothing proves it to be true (02:16:01) Allen: haha ok ok…but ur theory has logics haha (02:16:19) Allen: i’m just a personal who simply see a step and walk a step (02:16:24) Allen: person* (02:16:34) Felix Leong: coming back to pillars (02:16:49) Felix Leong: as said, a pillar can be anybody (02:16:59) Allen: yep (02:17:00) Felix Leong: and once a pillar is estabilished, it’ll remain there (02:17:11) Allen: parents , friends, support peers, god (02:17:18) Allen: lover (02:17:27) Allen: or anyone we seeks safe n comfort (02:17:32) Allen: ok (02:17:35) Felix Leong: and some pillars that you built yourself and was given a name (02:17:44) Felix Leong: an association (02:17:49) Allen: yep (02:18:28) Felix Leong: so in a way, ex’s can have stronger influences (02:18:58) Felix Leong: since your memory does jogs back and you can vaguely recall that there was once you were there (02:19:22) Felix Leong: even tho the pillar has been an extremely deplorable state now or that it has been reduced to shambles (02:19:38) Allen: yeah (02:20:03) Allen: i see ex as pillars which has fallen to bits (02:20:09) Allen: pebbles (02:20:19) Felix Leong: ok then, enough of my theories now, i need to go to sleep