Today’s Drifting Thoughts: The Birth of A Plan

Day 3 of constant reevaluation, no conclusion yet. But tons of ideas, Plan-A, B, Cs… Thinking of situations from different angles, pros and cons, gains and sacrifices…

It did made me think that I didn’t really know what I wanted in life… shrinks myself into a small shell 😞

But somehow I really felt the importance of working on something for myself, irregardless whether I go or stay at the same environment. I always sense that there’s something… something which is most important in my own life, yet I have no idea what that was… all I know is just to pursue, attempt to grasp it with my own hands. Yet time and time again, I found myself tumbling and rolling, stumbling over blocks… the feeling is almost the same as chasing one’s shadow, to be honest… Is that really the case? I did wonder and pondered somehow… but I guess I’m still missing the point.

But somehow, I just felt that I have rested enough, recovered from the scars somehow: Those scars that let me grew up to be who I am and appreciate even more in life. Guess it’s not rational to keep thinking of how to inflict the same scars on myself again in order to learn something… that’s not going to help. I think that’s what I have been doing to myself recently, I guess.

It’s almost time for me to try again, to spread my wings and soar to the sky. Back to search for that ultimate “truth”. After all… that “most important” something is something that I really wanted to search.