Today’s Drifting Thoughts: Phases Places

Bah… my health isn’t getting any better lately X_X. Just feeling like draggin’ myself all day long these days. I’m not entirely sure whether is it the weather, my personal diet or my lack of exercise these days, but definitely it really needs me to work things out now!

In other news, well… it wasn’t really anything interesting or extremely upbeat, I bet most people around me had heard a lot of my stress rants lately X_X. No thanks to an approaching deadline with my repair work half done X_X. Not to mention that I haven’t started my documentation work yet!

That aside… Well… just say that I’m still piecing the puzzle of the things around me. Somehow being a person like me who treats life as the ultimate sandbox, I kinda fiddle around with lots of different things and ideas and didn’t mind having some trouble myself. And that can sometimes be a little bit like an emotional see-saw to me (well, I like to describe it this way :p); which isn’t quite right in the sense that I’m the kind of person who tends to seek balance in things.

Kinda funny to think that usually ideals and what we actually react in real life tends to be the exact opposite to each other XD.

But anyway… I still finding difficulty in understanding others and myself… or at least understanding my own perception towards people around me. That especially applies to one particular person which definitely sparked the thought of my previous impromptu post (as in, the closer you are with somebody, eventually you’d notice that it’s a greater personal space to explore, in one way or the other).

And somehow it’s very, very curious (and probably risky) for me to “sandbox” my own experiences and thoughts in love and relationships. Which pretty much means that I sort of made a lot of mistakes along the way… and trying to avoid so much of the known mistakes that I felt very stiff and uninteresting at times. 😛

…

Somehow, a few weeks ago, I had the feeling that it’s going to be another transition point in my own life now (in my LJ terms, it’s progressing to the next chapter). I have nailed down the title, but the introductory poem didn’t came to me just yet so probably it’d take some time to develop. But I sort of wondered because the direction that I’m heading to is starting to become more hazy now: It’s far more harder say for certain what the future lies in front of me (unlike during my university years that I kinda knew where I’m heading to).

I’m not particularly sure what’s the reason I’m saying so, but for all I know is that there’s lots of possibilities that’d happen in my own life. And, as my usual style… well, let’s see what happens next ;).