Today’s Drifting Thoughts: Packed And Unready

Seh Hui Leong

Reflections

Well… I’m almost finished packing for tommorrow. Just need to copy some critical files from my compie then I should be OK.

Honestly speaking… as much as I really liked to go home, but my heart seems a bit heavy to leave as well… God… I haven’t leave yet and yet I’m missing people now ;____;. But thinking about it, most of my friends are already back in their hometown for Chinese New Year celebrations and being here wouldn’t help much… meh… ;____;.

At times like this, I do wonder whether my whole makeover thing is really worth it… am I afraid that I’m starting to lose my self identity? Or is it that nobody really cared anyway? … but thinking about it guess I’m just too self-conscious/sensitive with low esteem. Apprehension… no wonder change is kinda scary, it’s really like… once you board that ship, you’ll never know whether you’ll be able to go back to where you were before… It may be good, or it’ll bad… nobody knows.

Just all of a sudden, two words sudden came to mind… like a small voice whispering through my ears: “Be here”. Somewhat it seems to carry a really deep meaning in between, it’s more or less like “Live the moment”, but by my perspective, they are seems to be a bit different for some reasons. More or less, it just came to me like it means “Don’t worry what will happen next, just be here: perform the act in totality. Just focus on what you need to do, and let us do the rest for you.”

I believed that the gift to humans is the ability to choose: to choose whichever path and lifestyle they decide to live with. Guess I just have to take a deep breath and be strong…

[p/s: I’ll try to do my daily updates when I’m back home ^^]

Written by

Seh Hui Leong

Python programmer by trade, interested in a broad range of creative fields: illustrating, game design, writing, choreography and most recently building physical things. Described by a friend as a modern renaissance man.

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