The Apprehension…

It’s now days after I have been having some sort of apprehension building up…

Is it that I’m spreading too thin: that looking at my current responsibilities that I’m carrying now making me shiver from the spine? (read: deadlines)

Is it that I’m nervous: that I’m getting closer to my graduation days? (read: Dang I still haven’t started to build connections/future plans/blah blah blah…)

Is it that I’m afraid…: that I’ll lost the precious gifts that I have been given once we get far apart…? (read: Choon Hui and Erika)

… Or is it something… else?

Somewhat my apprehensions have messed up my mood and mind big time. Although frankly speaking all three things I mentioned above is definitely NOT problems in the first place, since I know that my fears are pretty much unfounded (more like petty worries, come to think about it). But if it were to be something else… what would that be?

Suddenly a scene in Fruit Basket (the manga) seems to flash into my mind: it’s one of the episodes when Souma Yuki’s mother attended the parent-teacher meeting in Yuki’s highschool. And when the meeting started, Yuki’s mother goes on dominating the whole meeting: saying what’s her future plans for Yuki… and Yuki is there: feeling helpless, fearful… clenching his fists in agony while his heart kept on telling him repeatively “Faster! Tell her how do you feel…!” But nothing happened… Yuki can’t gather enough courage to do so.

…

(Of course, being the typical manga, later on something DOES happen, just don’t want to spoil what’s next ;P)

Somewhat that seems to portray how I’m feeling now.