Poem: Parallel Loners

Every time I close my eyes
I see you… hurt…
Ever since when we are walking in parallel?
And why the distance between us is always far apart?
Every time I see you
You act like nothing happened
But deep down I still can sense
The bleeding in your heart

How many times when I close my eyes
I saw you hurt?
Ever since when we declare as friends
But never ever being close like one?
How many times I see you
I was holding back from calling you?
Perhaps I might be losing hope for many failed attempts
To get your attention

Every time I close my eyes
I see you… fading…
Ever since when my memories about ourselves are dissolving
And my feelings towards you are vanishing?
Every time I see you
You are getting further away from me
But deep down I can still sense
The bleeding in your heart

Sometimes… I’m afraid…
That I’m unable to see you again
Since the day we had gone separate ways
And I never ever left my eyes off you
Sometimes when I’m able to see you
You seem to look worse than before
Perhaps I might be losing hope
Yet I hate to think that you’ve fallen down while I can’t see you from afar

Every time when I close my eyes…
I was seeing… you…
Ever since when I’m hugging a pillow
And trying hard to retain a fading memory?
Every time I see you
You are getting smaller and smaller from my sight
But deep down I know…
I’m holding a knife in my heart…
And I’m bleeding…

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[:: Random Thoughts ::]

• Why I kept feeling hopeless when I can’t comfort someone in need? Is it that I was being shut out, or is it I didn’t dare to ask, or is it my thoughts are so fragmented when I’m feeling a strong emotion?
• Tomorrow’s my ex-crush’s birthday… … … As much as I know I’ll give him a message, and my hurts are closing up… I’m still feeling a little bit empty inside…
• May everyone who is feeling unloved/depressed be bless with love
• Paid my phone bills… phew… (Yeah… I know this is nonsense)